I've spent days, weeks even, wishing I wasn't so uninspired.
I've wished for ideas.
I've wished for plans.
All I wanted was to pick up the laptop,
Type away and create something I was proud of.
I've wished for my blog,
and for my exams.
They're in two weeks time.
And all I can do is stare at my books,
And wish the information was in my mind.
I wished I was more artistic.
I wish I never took art at GCSE.
It was all fun and games,
Until the first due date.
Scribbles on a page,
Once turned to in times of stress,
are now the cause of it.
I wish I didn't stress,
Not quite so much as I do now.
No where near as much.
Every little noise,
Brings a jump and a shake.
Sometimes tears too.
I wish I was more confident.
I just want to say hi,
Without crumbling away inside.
It would be nice to give an explanation,
Without a red complexion.
A simple message,
Shouldn't feel like life and death,
And a look shouldn't hold so much.
So much fear.
I wish things made more sense.
That I could write and write,
Just until everything falls into place.
Maybe beyond that.
I wish I wasn't so uninspired.
I've wished for ideas.
I've wished for plans.
All I wanted was to pick up the laptop,
Type away and create something I was proud of.
I've wished for my blog,
and for my exams.
They're in two weeks time.
And all I can do is stare at my books,
And wish the information was in my mind.
I wished I was more artistic.
I wish I never took art at GCSE.
It was all fun and games,
Until the first due date.
Scribbles on a page,
Once turned to in times of stress,
are now the cause of it.
I wish I didn't stress,
Not quite so much as I do now.
No where near as much.
Every little noise,
Brings a jump and a shake.
Sometimes tears too.
I wish I was more confident.
I just want to say hi,
Without crumbling away inside.
It would be nice to give an explanation,
Without a red complexion.
A simple message,
Shouldn't feel like life and death,
And a look shouldn't hold so much.
So much fear.
I wish things made more sense.
That I could write and write,
Just until everything falls into place.
Maybe beyond that.
I wish I wasn't so uninspired.
Recently I've found myself watching a YouTuber called Savannah Brown. One of the videos I've had on repeat is 'i wish i was (a flaw examination)', which is the video that inspired this post (Which I was terrified to actually upload...). I was actually thinking of posting this in audio form but thought against it... however you can let me know if you would be interested in me doing that.
I've been missing over here for a few weeks now, and it all ties in with that first line. I'm uninspired. Everything I enjoy has felt like a hefty task - but I'm looking at this post as a step in the right direction. I'm hoping to have blog posts up more regularly again, however, I do have my mock exams (followed by my GCSE's) coming up so they will be taking priority.
It's nice to have written again.
See you soon with another blog post,
Alison
I've been missing over here for a few weeks now, and it all ties in with that first line. I'm uninspired. Everything I enjoy has felt like a hefty task - but I'm looking at this post as a step in the right direction. I'm hoping to have blog posts up more regularly again, however, I do have my mock exams (followed by my GCSE's) coming up so they will be taking priority.
It's nice to have written again.
See you soon with another blog post,
Alison